First big disappointment; EFI D-U-N

I've stolen away in the corner of the student union building on the campus of Cornell College in Mount Vernon, IA (not to be confused with Cornell University in Ithaca) to clear my head with a journal entry that will double as a blog post. I've been writing longhand in my journal separately from this every night, but I need to punch some keys so this will double as the July 10 entry and my next post. If you'll indulge me...

Today we woke up to a 79-mile day from Clinton to Mount Vernon. From the very get-go, the nice folks in the Clinton YMCA were telling us to expect a morning full of thunderstorms. It started around 7 AM, right around the time we were getting ready to leave. With lightning flashing once in awhile, the leaders wisely decided to delay our departure. We relaxed until about 10 AM and even caught some live Tour de France coverage when word came that the storm had passed. However, there was another storm on the way. We gathered for a quick meeting, where we decided that those who wanted to bike would ride ASAP and the rest would go in the van and a bus offered up by the Y (very kind of them). The stipulation: we had to be at the church by 5 PM, giving us about 6-6.5 hours to do 80 miles, no mean feat and faster than we've gone all trip.

Anyway, with the group splitting, it was assumed the van would drop their half of the riders off as soon as the storm passed and they would ride into Mount Vernon, and those riding the full way would just seek shelter when the storm hit. 15 of us decided to ride it out. I can't tell you how jacked we were. There was this huge adrenaline rush as we moved to get our gear in order and move out as soon as possible to beat the weather and the deadline. We'd be responsible for our own lunch too, so we were scrounging rations like we were soldiers going into battle. It was going to be us against the elements. I've always dreamed of playing in a meaningful sporting event and never achieved it, so I cherish moments like this, however small, when you can test your physical capabilities and mental toughness.

We shoved off at 10:25 and set a torrid pace. We had a very slight crosswind/headwind, and the flat stretches of Indiana and Illinois were gone, replaced by gentle rolling hills. I cranked out 20 miles in the first hour, feeling great about the pace we'd set (we needed to do around 13 mph, and including stops, we normally average 10). I felt like I was on steriods. However, after making a turn west, I saw lightning crack from the next storm in the distance. Four of us (Shawn, Isabel, Maso, and myself) pulled up and decided to seek shelter in a barn we'd just passed. As we got permission from the owner the rest of the group caught up, so we prepared to hunker down until danger passed. At that moment, the bus caught up with us.

I wasn't opposed to going on the bus. I rationalized that I could do the distance the bus drove us once we got to Mount Vernon that afternoon to square our mileage. Yet we kept driving and driving. Only when we were about 20 miles away from the city did it come to light that we weren't going halfway; we were going to Mount Vernon and skipping the day of riding. As Caroline would say, "Depression."

Sidebar: Entering this trip, my first goal was to complete the trip from Providence to Seattle. My second was to do it all by bike, not spending a moment in the van. During orientation, the phrase "Every F'in Inch," or EFI, came to light, and I adopted the slogan. I even named my bike Efi. I've had this goal of biking across the United States for quite some time (5-6 years perhaps), so it has become very important to me to actually bike the whole way. At orientation they warned us that EFI probably wouldn't be possible because things happen that are outside your control (injuries, bike malfunctions, and grrr, weather), but I still adopted the slogan anyway.

Safe to say, I'm been in a lousy mood since we got into Mount Vernon because EFI crashed and burned. I'm not blaming the leaders for their decision; they made the safe choice to get us out of the lightning. I would have liked to have done the halfway thing since the storm stopped well before town and it's a beautiful day now, but that would have required a lot of coordination and extra driving on their part. Understandable. I'm just angry at the circumstances and needing to write/vent about it.

To many of you, this probably doesn't seem like a big deal. "So what if they have to ride in the van one day? It's just a bike ride." For whatever reason, that's not how I click. If I'm going to do it, I want to do it fully. I'll be excited to be back on the bike tomorrow and ready to go. I just reserve the right to be angry this afternoon.

I've thought about adding the 60 remaining miles to my rides over the next few days, but it still doesn't get me back the patch of land between Clinton and Mount Vernon. There's a big gap in my chain, and I feel like I cheated today.

Like I said, I'll be rearing and ready to go tomorrow. I won't allow this to taint the rest of the experience, as we still have 2,000 miles to bike and many wonderful places to see. I also need to still be a positive voice for the rest of the group (a job which I haven't done well this afternoon). I just had to type away my frustration this evening before accepting it and moving on.

There. That's done. Circumstances out of my control have taken over and this helped me make my peace with it. Time to move on. I'm very, very much looking forward to tomorrow.